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Learn more about us here, and find out how to submit your work here! We met on the Internet (we read each other’s blogs) and then became friends IRL when we both took classes at a summer art program in Philadelphia.Even though we went to different schools and lived in separate towns, we bonded over our similarities: We were both nerdy, ambitious feminists who liked to dress up and joke around.Finding out if you intimidate them can be the key to attracting Mr. Alternatively, they will look at you when you are not paying attention; but when you notice, they will look away.When a man averts his gaze like this, he may be communicating that he is afraid of you, according to Reginald Adams and Robert Kleck in a 2003 study in “Psychological Science.” His nonverbal behavior is telling you to avoid him, rather than approach him.GABBY: When I imagine an intimidating person, I think of a physically strong girl wearing a black leather jacket and perfect cat eyeliner. GABBY: I just Googled the definition of , and it means “to make timid or fearful, frighten especially, or to compel or deter as if by threats.” HAZEL: WE’RE NOT SCARY OR THREATENING! GABBY: I don’t think I’ve ever frightened someone into doing something for me, but one time in high school this boy I hated said that I scared him.Which I think I DID, because I basically tore apart his sexist, racist statements in class in a way that made him question his existence! I think confidence definitely gets roped in with intimidation, too.I don’t feel angry at people who are cooler than me—I don’t like want to wreck their life because they have a boyfriend and I don’t, or they hang out with rock bands and I don’t.Intimidation could just be feeling like you’re inadequate in comparison to a person.

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GABBY: But people also project their own insecurities, too. If I meet someone who is dressed really well, or just doesn’t seem interested in getting to know me, I write them off as intimidating or too cool instead of risking approaching them and having them reject me.When someone described me as intimidating when I was younger I was kind of like, I internalized it completely. Sometimes being intimidating does sound kind of cool. Most of the people I meet are very extroverted, and I think when they meet someone like me, who’s more introverted and quiet, they think I’m trying to be intimidating.

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